I find scatterings and smatterings of the same ideas colliding around my consciousness. I get a magazine that has an article here…I get sent to a link that has a video there…and they are unrelated yet connected….and they are saying what streams across my mind when I walk down the stairs or I drive to work or I brush my teeth.

I think about faith and religion and souls and paths and where things will head and what it all means on a constant basis.
Sometimes I just have to shut it off because I AM NOT GOING TO GET THE ANSWER TODAY.
Its sort of like that Ani song ‘What if no ones watching’….it spooks me, and then I realize it doesn’t matter….
But then there are the days when I have a real crisis of doubt – the last time I wigged myself out I remember the homily at the next day in church seemed to speak to me directly – calming my fears.
And then I read this article by fellow Providence Associate, Brother Barry. It reminds me that my doubt is a blessing, that it increases my faith and keeps it on its toes.
And then I stumbled on this lecture by Richard Feynman (probably the most brilliant scientist ever – Nadie has a man crush on him)….
I think it is interesting that both a man of god and a man of science came to the same answer…living with doubt is better than having all the answers…and especially better than assuming incorrect answers….
signing off to watch further collisions…..

January 9th was the Zerker’s birthday.
We had a little party for her with all of our family and a few friends.

It was lovely.

I can’t believe its been a whole year. It seems like she was just an itty bitty baby yesterday, then again it is like she has always been here.
She has been getting really good at walking around. By her birthday she was doing the zombie walk for a few steps. Then she decided at her party that she was going to show off and walk across the room.
Of course, there is a video for this first amazing year….

I love my little girl.
She is braver every day. Climbing up chairs, falling off of beds, learning how to get down on her own. She had her yearly check up. She is growing right on schedule. She is napping every day. (I think that will change when she goes back to daycare.) She is drinking whole milk. She eats everything you give her, and of course trys to eat things you don’t give her. (She doesn’t understand that boardbooks are for literary consumption, NOT human consumption!!!)
She absolutely adores the dogs. She is amazed at the cats. She talks to them. Doodas and Kittehs. She pretends to read herself books. She got her first pair of Stride Rite shoes. She is finally being cooperative when we change her diapers. She loves toast.
It is hard to believe it can get any better than this….I am sure Charlie will have something to do with me eating those words….I am so blessed.

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